Goodbye John

The world lost a beautiful and gentle soul yesterday with the passing of my dear friend John.  Even though we knew this day was coming for the past 2+ years, I always thought it would be much later on, that we would have so much more time.  John was so giving - taking friends and family on trips around the world on his "Goodbye Cruel World" tour, and I was lucky enough to accompany him to Napa and The French Laundry, by far one of my most favorite and special vacations.  He was selfless and humble - when people would talk to him about how unfair his cancer was {and it really really was}, he would be quick to point out that everybody has their stuff they have to deal with that is unfair, and this just happened to be his.  He was sweet - he once texted me to tell me that the coffee shop by REI had a drink named after me, the "beautiful Stephanie":)  And he was so incredibly smart - he was the go-to person at work for basically everything and I never hesitated to ask him for advice about work, life, love.....everything.  I have so many memories with John - him being so excited to play matchmaker for me; after-work happy hours that went well into the night; picking him up from a doctor's appointment and taking him out for beers {and feeling like the worst nurse in the world}; dancing in the lobby in Sonoma; him kindly telling me my hot pink underwear was not so invisible through my dress at the end of the day; the word "lovely"; learning what an amazing artist he is; a rousing game of Cards Against Humanity that went into the wee hours of the morning on a work night; him eagerly and excitedly driving me home one night, which was way out of his way, but it was a beautiful night and he wanted to show off his mini-convertible; spending his past 3 birthdays with him, because we were his people, and we loved him.  John, it really is a cruel cruel world, and I know it hasn't truly hit me yet that you're really gone.  You have left your mark on everyone who's had the privilege of knowing you, and I am truly honored to have been your friend.

Rest in peace, my friend.

xoxo,
stephanie marie

to read more of john's journey navigating the shitty effects and consequences of stage iv colon cancer, check out his amazingly written and refreshing blog, "John's 'WTF? I've got cancer?' Blog"